My Penmanship is a Wreck!

A year and a half ago I had elbow surgery, where they snipped off the tendon at my elbow, then moved it to another spot and reattached it. Before that, my handwriting was really bad. In fact, all my life my penmanship was atrocious, much to the frustration of many a teacher.

My hand would cramp up, it could take me most of the night to crank out a report for school and make sure it was legible. And when I’d write fiction, it was a long, slow process.

Since the surgery, nothing has changed as far as my handwriting goes. I still cramp up, the whole hand and forearm hurt after just a few minutes, and I really can’t use a pen for more than signing my name or filling out a check.

And that’s where I’m lying.

I can. If I practice, relearn how to write and hold a pen, and give myself permission to suck at it for a few months.

My surgeon and my physical therapist said I could use a pen, that the tendon was just fine, and nothing I did could ruin their hard work. What I had to do was change the way I held a pen, and practice.

I’ve come to realize, and admit, that I’ve been using excuses, like “It hurts to hold a pen for more than a few minutes.” And “My handwriting is terrible, I’d never be able to read what I wrote to transcribe it.” Along with “My thoughts come out too fast, my fingers need a keyboard to keep up.”

Bullshit.

Today I found this site, with excellent advice on retraining your handwriting. Interestingly, they mention the wrong way to write is to use just your HAND, while the proper way to write is to use your hand, arm and shoulder. What makes that interesting is that Pete also mentioned when he writes, he seems to use his arm and shoulder when he does. I’d never heard of that before.

There’s also an interesting aspect for the Writer. When you write by hand, as a Writer, you’re forced to use completely different writerly “muscles”. You cannot write as fast as you can think, but that’s the point.

You also cannot hit the backspace button, or use spell check. That is also the point.

I find when I’m writing on the computer, sentences come flowing out of me in stammers. I’ll know what I want to say for about a paragraph, but then I have to pause and consider the wording for the next one. Then another spurt, followed by a pause. Typically after a page or three, I stop and read over what I wrote, contemplate it, then make some changes.

Writing by hand slows you down to the point of really thinking about your words, your pacing, your next move. You’re more apt to try out a sentence in your head three or four ways before putting it down. On the computer, I’m more prone to spewing it out, then hitting the backspace, trying it another way, deleting, trying it again.

I think writing by hand forces the writer to think more. To consider.

I’m not suggesting those of us who type it out aren’t thinking, or considering. And I’m not going to say we’re typing out crap. No, certainly not. I’m typing this, and it isn’t crap (I heard that!)

But I have a dream – and that’s to write by hand again. Not every novel, not every time. I do, however, need to reclaim that ability. I need that option, for those times when I’m without the computer, or my eyes are so sick of seeing a screen, and watching a cursor blink.

This weekend I’ll be away from the computer, so I’m going to bring a notebook with me and try working on the penmanship, adding to my Tea Debacle novel. And I’m going to keep practicing, working on the techniques on that web site. I’m going to find a good pen, and reteach myself how to write.

And I’m going to hand write my next novel.

And I’m going to win, because I am a leaf on the wi – hmm, maybe I need a new quote.